冷笑话精选:
目瞪口呆!
这竟然是个岁的男孩子??!!!
tRWViWO
[Stunned! < br > it was a year old boy?? !!!!!!!!! < br > tRWViWO]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!
欧米茄今日宣布刘诗诗成为新任名人大使!
[Omega announced today that Cecilia liu become the new celebrity ambassador!]
欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博小野妹子学吐槽:
🙏🏻🙏🏻@我的朋友是个呆B帮扩@追风少年刘全有也是我的好友,真的拜托大家了,快着急死了[泪][泪]
[🙏🏻🙏🏻@我的朋友是个呆B帮扩@追风少年刘全有也是我的好友,真的拜托大家了,快着急死了[泪][泪]]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。优酷:
#电视剧将军在上##大片起来嗨#帅将军@马思纯 美郡王@盛一伦 合唱《成全》,一个起调高,一个嗓音低,加上搅局的@撒贝宁 一首温柔的歌,竟然唱出了魔性的效果!tRWtQH
[In the # # # show general large up hi handsome general @ Sandra beauty king county @ # sheng a chorus perfect, a raise, a low voice, and poison the @ sa beining a gentle song, sing ones effect! tRWtQH]
汽车之家:
#家人来“找茬”#亲爱的家人们,游戏时间到,快来回答吧。下面这张图你能最快猜出它是哪款车吗?最快答对的用户会获得家家送出的精美礼品一份。正确答案将于今晚点转发本微博公布。
[# # family to search for my dear family, the game time, quick to answer. The image below you can guess what it is fastest car? Fastest right users will get every send a nice present. The correct answer will be announced this late forwarding this weibo. ]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。小浪同学爱吐槽:
【男子动物园求婚 单身河马紧贴玻璃贡献“死亡凝视”[允悲]】美国一男子在动物园里跟女友求婚,男子单膝跪地掏出戒指...就在此时,水箱内的单身河马入镜了...目不转睛地围观了这浪漫的求婚场景:它还把脸贴在玻璃窗上,双眼紧紧盯着男子手中的戒指…这画面真是一万点暴击↓↓tRWqOTq
[The man zoo to marry him Single hippo clingy glass contribution death stare allow grief 】 a man in the United States in the zoo with his girlfriend to marry him, man knelt to take out the ring... Just then, single hippo her tank... Propose intently watch the romantic scene it is my face against the window, his eyes tightly staring at the man in the hands of the ring... This picture is really ten thousand crit left left tRWqOTq down]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。新浪汽车:
城会玩[允悲]@新车情报局[阴险]我们局花真会玩
[City play [allow sad] @ new cia [insidious] our bureau can really play]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。李开复:
说的好,给@沈博阳 点赞@沈博阳文末还是被点名了。感谢媒体朋友们过去几天的关心。不接受采访,这里一并回复了:)完全没兴趣接这个摊子,蛋壳发展非常好。 )曾经沧海,对跨国互联网公司在中国发展不看好。搞清楚定位。。微博转发字数有限,更多回复请查看图片 tRWoQUi
[Say good, give @ Shen Boyang thumb up @ Shen Bo raised at the end of the named. Thanks to the media friends care for the past few days. In an interview, along with all the reply here) no interest in the stall, eggshell development is very good. ) once the sea, to the international Internet companies develop in China does not look good. Clear positioning. The microblogging forwarding co., LTD, more tRWoQUi reply please see pictures]
创新工场CEO,媒体联系:press@chuangxin小野妹子学吐槽:
是不是沙盒游戏的玩家脑洞都突破天际,为了表达#我爱宝藏世界# 游戏里能上天入地,他们就在现实里肉身上天飞檐走壁;游戏里能DIY坐骑,他们就把现实里自己的座驾DIY成痛车。游戏里能建造出长着一张滑稽脸的迷之生物……让我觉得自己被嘲讽了[笑而不语]……你们这么牛叉,@宝藏世界TROVE 知道吗?...全文: m.weibo
[Isnt sandbox game players imagination breakthrough in the sky, to express # # I love treasure, the world games in dungeons, in reality they are flesh climbing heaven; Games can DIY mounts, their own car DIY into reality in the car. Games can build with a funny face fan of biological... Let me feel is mocked [smiling without a word]... You are so great, @ treasure TROVE know world? ... The full text m. eibo]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。青年时报:
【杭州一男子被自己养的小狗咬断食指,而且接不回去了!】都说狗是人类最好的朋友,家住江干区三堡的方先生对此也很认同。孰料昨晚(月日),他却被自己养的小黄狗咬了,直接咬断了食指的一小截,并且再也接不回去了……tRWczq
[[hangzhou a man by his dog bite the index finger, and receive not back! All say a dog is mans best friend, who lives in grand jianggan district at Mr. Fang are very identity. What (June ) last night, but he raised his little yellow bitten by a dog, bite the index finger of a small section directly, and not go back anymore... tRWczq]
新闻热线: 工作沟通、广告合作请联系微信:Alex猫扑:
【现实版”飞屋环游记“ 英男子乘氢气球飞行公里】据RT电视台日报道,来自英国的探险家汤姆·摩根将一束氦气球绑在露营椅上,自己坐了上去,升上南非约翰内斯堡的上空。摩根飞行了公里,最高的时候升到了米的高空。他用个氦气球完成了这项飞行。摩根说,乘坐氦气球穿越非洲大地的旅程非常...全文: m.weibo
[Real-life up the man took a balloon flying kilometers] according to RT television days of reports, British explorer, Tom Morgan will be a bunch of helium balloons tied to the camping chair, sat up, up in Johannesburg, South Africa. Morgan flying kilometers, the highest rose meters high. He finished the flight a helium balloon. Across Africa, Morgan said in a helium balloon journey very... The full text m. eibo]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:新浪汽车:
#微博交通台#【交警查扣“违法王”货车条违法 被扣多分![允悲]】一辆货车累计有条违章记录未处理,累积记分达分,最主要的违法行为是“违反禁令标志指示”的“闯禁行”。目前,该车已被当地交警查扣。 tRWdUZ
[# # weibo communication radio [police seized king illegal article van illegal deducted points! [allow sad]] a van article has endorsed untreated, accumulative scores points, the main illegal behavior is contrary to ban flag indicates stop. At present, the car has been the local traffic police seized. tRWdUZ]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。小浪同学爱吐槽:
【夫妇入住五星级酒店凌晨房门被打开 酒店答应赔偿后又反悔[衰]】孙鹏夫妇入住上海某五星级酒店,共度良辰美景并存的美妙夜晚...谁知凌晨房门竟被陌生男子刷开!酒店称除免去夫妻住宿费外,还送件万元以内的礼物。但当夫妇取礼物时,却因这个理由被告知赔偿中止↓↓咋回事?tRWLCL
[The couple stay in star hotel in the morning after the door is opened the hotel promised compensation again [failure]] his couple at a five-star hotel, Shanghai for its moments of beauty and wonderful night... Who knows the door in the morning was a strange man to brush! Hotel said that in addition to revoke a couple accommodation outside, still send gift within ten thousand yuan. But when couples take a gift, because of this reason was told that the compensation to suspend the left left...? tRWLCL]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。汽车之家:
#家家新车图解##马自达CX-#【家族又添新成员 实拍体验马自达CX-】SUV车型不仅是国内消费者所热捧,在全球范围内也有大量喜爱这一车型的人群,因此SUV车型历来也是车企们研发的重点。在本届东京车展上,马自达就为我们带来了它SUV家族的新成员——CX-,下面我们就一起来看看吧。tRWLosX
[# every new graphic CX - # # # Mazda 【 family added a new member CX - will experience the Mazda 】 SUV models is not only by domestic consumers, also have a lot of love which a worldwide model, therefore the SUV models has always been the key point of the automakers are research and development. At the Tokyo motor show, Mazda it brings in the SUV CX -, the new members of the family - lets together and see it. tRWLosX]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。微博搞笑排行榜:
[舔屏][舔屏]@uni_真船 吃虾了吃虾了!
[[lick screen] [lick screen] @ uni_ real ship Eat shrimp eat shrimp!]
微博搞笑中心!每天搜罗最搞笑最好玩的微博。关注我,获得每日新鲜笑料!(欢迎合作,投稿)↖(^ω^)↗但斌:
谢谢老兄[作揖][心][鲜花]@老曾阿牛时间玫瑰大绽放!@韩广斌- 短期的都没什么意思,往往有误导作用。@厦门阿超@韩广斌- [哈哈][good]@股道热肠也但总和广斌,真的很棒!
[Thanks dude [bowing] [heart] [flowers] @ old was pig time roses bloom! @ Han Guangbin - short-term means nothing, is often deceptive. O @ xiamen super @ Han Guangbin - [ha ha] [good] @ good Joe fields but also combined wide bin, really great!]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
@老曾阿牛是什么样的体制导致了警察成为了小偷?我不禁深深地陷入了沉思。。。@韩广斌- 坏人不分行业
[@ old had pig is what kind of system led to the police became a thief? I cant help but deeply lost in thought... @ Han Guangbin - bad guys dont divisions]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
@老曾阿牛[二哈][二哈]
[@ old had pig [two ha] [two ha]]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
@昭晧:强强联手[加油]@老曾阿牛 平安那么多钱,居然去举牌同为金融行业的工行;茅台那么多现金,居然去搞什么金融平台?在我看来,他们两家互相买对方的股票才是最好的结果!@但斌 @套利胡子 [舔屏][舔屏]
[@ zhao dust combining the [oil] @ old pig peace so much money, incredibly to sign with icbc for the financial industry; Maotai so much cash, went to what financial platform? In my opinion, they two to buy each others stock is the best result! @ but bin @ arbitrage beard [lick screen] [lick screen]]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
也祝贺王文与广斌兄![心][鲜花]@股道热肠也回复@一个外向的内向精神病患者我在香港有个基金,今年业绩也不错。@一个外向的内向精神病患者王叔,你也是基金经理么,还是自由投资人?@股道热肠也但总和广斌,真的很棒!
[Congratulations to wang wen and broad bin brother! [heart] [a flower] @ reply good Joe fields is also @ a extroversion introversion psychiatric patients I have a fund in Hong Kong, this years performance is good too. @ a outgoing Wang Shu introverted people with mental illness, you are also a fund manager, or free investors? @ good Joe fields but also combined range bin, really great!]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人冷笑话精选:
妈我人难受,玩手机玩的吧[微笑]@辣条娘今日份的丧[失望]@文科班校花酱一些小事加起来就能让人崩溃@水晶男孩鸡大帅[伤心]@黄濑濑濑濑原来我不是一个人[跪了]@吃不胖的小……是我妈了
[Mom Im tough, play mobile phones play [smiles] @ spicy dry tofu niangs share of the loss of [disappointed] today @ arts class beauty queen sauce little things can add up to let people collapse @ crystal boy chicken prince [sad] @ yellow wrasse wrasse wrasse wrasse originally I am not a man] [kneeling @ small eat not fat... Is my mom]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!但斌:
回复@阿珠_[心][鲜花][作揖]@阿珠_感谢微博,是微博让我结识了但斌,古道热肠也。是你们的无私让我分亨了茅台,平安。认识到价值投资的重要性,谢谢你们![鲜花][鲜花]@但斌回复@比巴菲特还巴菲特[作揖][心][鲜花]@比巴菲特还巴菲特但总的胸怀坦荡磊落,像大海一样
[Bead o reply @ _ [heart] [flowers] [bowing] @ bead _ o thank weibo, is let me get to know but bin, warm-hearted. Is your selfless let me share the maotai, peace. Realize the importance of value investment, thank you! [a flower] [flowers] @ but bin reply @ than buffett also buffett [bowing] [heart] [flowers] @ than buffett also buffett but overall bosom is magnanimous, like the sea]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@KezhongHuang以诚待人![心][鲜花][作揖]@KezhongHuang但总的朋友满天下,但总的能量满人间,但总的信念满世界@但斌回复@alexhdong[心][鲜花][作揖]@alexhdong俺的家乡,欢迎但总[鼓掌]
[Reply @ KezhongHuang to treat people sincerely! [heart] [flowers] [bowing] @ KezhongHuang but the total friends the whole country, but the total energy , but the total faith world @ but bin reply @ alexhdong [heart] [flowers] [bowing] @ alexhdong my hometown, welcome but always [applause.]]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
转:今年以来茅台酒“一瓶难求”,股价也随之大涨,接连突破元、元、元高位。多家券商给出了贵州茅台强烈推荐、增持、买入的评级,并给出了元、元、元等高目标价位。近期茅台股价迎来了连续微调。从三季报中可以看出,随着股价攀升,不少机构在逐渐获利了结,除证金外,易方达资产、...全文: m.weibo
[ since this year maotai a difficult beg, share price also rose, breakthrough yuan RMB, the yuan, high in succession. Several brokerages gives the guizhou maotai is highly recommended, overweight, buy rating, and yuan RMB, the yuan, such as target price. Maotai shares recently ushered in the continuous tuning. Can be seen from three quarterly reports, as share prices rise, many organizations are gradually taking profits, in addition to the gold, e assets,... The full text m. eibo]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@懂得舍得是难得没那么大影响!只是记录自己的生活@懂得舍得是难得但总虽不是中国股市价值投资的第一人,但绝对是有史以来影响力最大的,改变了中国股市的投资理念。但总对价值投资的宣贯,好比篮球之神乔丹对NBA的宣传。@但斌回复@alexhdong[心][鲜花][作揖]
[Reply @ know how willing to give up is not so rare big impact! Just @ know how willing to give up the life, is a rare but always is not the first investment in Chinas stock market value, but absolutely is the most influential ever, changed the Chinese stock market investment philosophy. But always stable cross of value investment, such as propaganda the basketball gods Jordan in the NBA. @ reply but bin @ alexhdong [heart] [flowers] [bowing]]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人百度网盘:
更大的容量,更快的速度,更安全的存储。用科技开启人工智能的时代,与#华为Mate#一起预见未来。关注@华为终端官方微博 @百度网盘 ,转发评论此微博,即有机会获得Mate力足大礼包一份。我们将于月日准时开奖[小黄人高兴]
[Greater capacity, faster, more secure storage. With open era of artificial intelligence science and technology, together with the # huawei Mate# predict the future. Focus @ huawei terminal official weibo @ baidu website so forward to comment on the weibo, which have the opportunity to get a Mate force the full package. We will work on time on the month [yellow people happy]]
百度网盘是百度公司推出的一款云服务产品。通过百度网盘,您可以将照片、文档、音乐、通讯录等数据在各类设备中备份和管理,亿用户的选择,亿用户的信任!世界很复杂,百度更懂你。官方微信公众号:百度网盘小浪同学爱吐槽:
【应王室请求 只甘肃猎隼乘包机前往卡塔尔】日前,卡塔尔王室请求从我国境内捕获猎隼开展科学研究。日,只甘肃猎隼乘专用包机前往卡塔尔。此前,沙特王子曾带着他的只猎隼坐飞机外出打猎,场面相当惊人↓↓据悉这些猎隼每只价值约两万美金...[哆啦A梦吃惊]tRWhzT
[The request should be royal family Saker in gansu province only take flight to Qatar 】 a few days ago, the qatari royal family request from capture saker in conducting scientific research in our country. Day, gansu saker by special charter flights to Qatar. Had been with him only Saudi prince saker flying out hunting, scene quite striking left left is the saker each worth about $twenty thousand... [doraemon surprised] tRWhzT]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。但斌:
老兄的言论,堪比“哲学家”@否极泰董宝珍很想知道神有几个老婆!每周几次性生活!神的早点是油条还是煎饼果子!神在生小孩是需不需要坐月子!?请和神认识的人给介绍一下!@但斌[心][鲜花]@后棚子:我能得到的一切都是神的恩赐,平安都来自耶稣的保守,应永怀敬畏之心和感恩之心。
[Mans comments, as philosopher @ no Thai Dong Baozhen would like to know that god has several wife! Sex several times a week! The breakfast is Fried dough sticks or pancake fruit of god! God are need nursing in baby! ? Please introduce and god know! @ but bin [heart] after [flowers] @ shed all I get is the gift of god, peace came from conservative, should perpetuate the heart of awe and gratitude.]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人一块去旅行:
上海美食攻略 | 一直很爱各种美味的小吃,这次整理了很多我吃过的网红小吃:咸蛋黄鸡蛋仔 芝士西多士 焦糖肉桂卷 芒果乳酪包 榴莲糯米糍 蝴蝶酥等等~总有一款是你的爱,快点来种草吧! 作者:花咲伊
[Shanghai food guide | always loved all kinds of delicious snacks, the compiled a lot of web celebrity snacks Ive ever tasted, salty yolk eggs Cheese west toast Caramel cinnamon rolls Mango cheese packages Durian glutinous rice Ci Butterfly cake and so on ~ there is always a is your love, hurry up to grow grass! Author flower sakura sake,]
我们的征途是星辰大海,愿做你旅程中的灯塔,一路照亮你前行。合作QQ:新浪汽车:
#微博交通台#【警方夜间设卡 克隆车被当街拦获[吃惊]】上海警方在夜晚设卡行动时,发现一辆涉嫌克隆车的出租车。驾驶员见到警察神情十分紧张,随后民警在车上搜出大量伪造交通卡,是车主准备换给乘客的空卡,并且后备箱里有两块伪造车牌。嫌疑人郭某因伪造证件被处以日治安拘留和元罚款。车辆移交...全文: m.weibo
[# # weibo communication radio [police set up checked posts at night Cloned cars be street block won [surprised]] Shanghai police set up checked posts in the night action, found a suspected of clone car taxi. The driver saw the police very tense, then the police unearthed a large number of counterfeit card, in the cars owner to change to the passengers empty card, there are two piece of forged license plate and trunk. Suspects named for forgery is a fine day security detention and yuan. Vehicle transfer... The full text m. eibo]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。汽车之家:
#家人帮家人#@哼哼哈伊喵了个喵大侠 :“大家好,我想入手一台全部下来万左右的轿车,女生,上班开,家里是二线省会城市,目前看了马自达昂克赛拉,本田思域,还有别的好的推荐吗?想要空间大一点的,感谢!”
[# @ # family help family hem meow meow warrior hello, I want to start a car of all down all around, girl, go to work, at home are second-tier provincial capital city, is in watching the Mazda Sarah, Honda civic, there are other good recommendation? Want to space bigger, thank you! ]
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【警方夜间设卡 克隆车被当街拦获】上海警方在夜晚设卡行动时,发现一辆涉嫌克隆车的出租车。驾驶员见到警察神情十分紧张,随后民警在车上搜出大量伪造交通卡,是车主准备换给乘客的空卡,并且后备箱里有两块伪造车牌。警方介绍,克隆车一般车况较差,有时大灯都不亮,车身重新喷漆痕迹明显,另外离合...全文: m.weibo
[The police set up checked posts at night Cloned cars was street block by Shanghai police set up checked posts at night, found a suspected of clone car taxi. The driver saw the police very tense, then the police unearthed a large number of counterfeit card, in the cars owner to change to the passengers empty card, there are two piece of forged license plate and trunk. Police introduction, cloned cars generally poor shape, sometimes headlights are not bright, obvious effect of the body paint again, another clutch... The full text m. eibo]
这个官微有意思,有车没车不重要,带你装逼带你飞优酷:
#电视剧将军在上#咳咳,有的时候,话不要太多呀,将军其实有很多不“方便”问的事情呀,容易被怼啊!意外看到魔性的壁画,没想到威武的叶将军@马思纯 竟然是个颜控!#马思纯将军在上#
tRWviBI
[# # TV in general (ahem, sometimes, things dont take too much ah, general things that dont actually have a lot of convenient to ask ah, easy to Dui! Accidentally see ones murals, think that mighty leaf general @ Sandra is a yan control! # # general Sandra in < br > tRWviBI]
天猫:
内心戏竟被老板一眼识破,更诧异的是老板居然还发来了这个……#双要放假# tRWoXYhE
[Narations recognise a was the boss, more surprised is that the boss also sent this... # # tRWoXYhE double to holiday]
天猫,阿里巴巴集团旗下网站,亚洲领先的网上商城。开始体验 :tmall 【客服电话】南方都市报:
【这项大国工程厉害了!.秒,听到宇宙的心跳![赞]】国家天文台近日宣布,“中国天眼”FAST “听见”了来自宇宙颗脉冲星的声音,距地球分别约.万光年和光年。发现第一颗脉冲星,FAST望远镜只用了.秒。这一举实现了中国在脉冲星发现领域“零的突破”,为世界射电天文学发展作出突出贡献。...全文: m.weibo
[【 the power project much!. Second, hear the heartbeat of the universe. [who]] national observatory announced recently, Chinas eye FAST hear the sound from the universe of the pulsar, and from earth about respectively. Thousands of light-years and light years away. Only found the first pulsar, FAST telescope. Seconds. It implements the China in the field of pulsar found the breakthrough of zero, made outstanding contribution to the development of radio astronomy for the world. ... The full text m. eibo]
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