2018年5月5日星期六

Poison tongue mouth base teases, YanZheng meter of eight legs are long, cold brother eight pieces o

冷笑话精选:
    阿信:???@豆瓣说我想捶死你[允悲]@阿信兜里的小骨头哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈什么鬼烦死了@Destiny咸鱼噗。哈哈哈哈这特么什么玩意儿[笑cry][允悲]
[Ashin????? @ douban said I want to beat dead you [allow sad] @ a-shin wowed a small bone in his pocket ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha what tired @ Destiny salted fish poof. Ha ha ha ha, the yao what [laugh cry] [allow sad]]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!

微博位置:
    🙏🙏🙏祈福希望平安!
[🙏🙏🙏祈福希望平安!]

发微博带上“位置”,在冰冷的地点留下你温暖的故事。投诉建议 fujia@staff.weibo

丑女达人:
    玩P图,把自己个哪个女人像上都有违和感,和这个合上了,莫非我前世是个男的?[汗] ​
[Play P figure, to a woman who like have acosmia feeling, and the closed, my past life is a man? [Mr Khan]]

兵来将挡,水来土掩,天塌下来老公扛!

BORGHESE-贝佳斯:
    五四青年改造指南,从不担忧一整天的肌肤会干燥,因为有贝佳斯赋活青春全日水活乳霜!想要青春水嫩肌,就在早晚洁面之后,全脸涂抹,超强锁水力,维持一整天的柔润嫩滑! ​
[WuSiQing years, guide, never worry about all day long the skin will be dry, because there are borghese activating youth day water live creams! Want to youth water tender muscle, after morning and evening facial cleaning, full face daub, super hydraulic lock, maintain a whole days soft and smooth! ​]

Borghese贝佳斯品牌源自意大利,品牌设计灵感及故事亦建基于此。二次世界大战之后,La Dolce Vita为意大利注入创意与活力,把意大利塑造成世界灵感摇篮。于“永恒之城”罗马居住的贝佳斯家族是意大利的名门望族,远至文艺复兴时期,贝佳斯家族在罗马已有极具影响力, 家族显赫包括公爵、皇子、皇族、政治家、教皇等位高权重的人物,于罗马向负盛名。当时意大利并未出现尊贵护肤品牌,所以贝佳斯皇妃(Princess Marcella Borghese)决定以意大利独一无二的天然资源 - 矿物温泉- 为建立护肤品牌的灵感源头,打造意大利成为顶尖美肤皇国。于六十多年的发展历程中,BORGHESE贝佳斯始终如一,致力贯彻推动天然健康美肤理念,倡导奢宠自我、探索质美生活,让现代女性在姣好的容颜中保持高贵精致的姿态。

猫扑:
    #猫扑晚安#消受不起的热情[允悲] ​
[The enthusiasm of the # # mop goodnightt afford [allow sad]]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。 商务合作-曹先生QQ: ;杨女士QQ:

新浪汽车:
    #交通万象#【嫌滴滴司机技术差 驾照过期女子换位驾驶[doge]】近日,一名女子嫌叫来的滴滴司机车技太差,便提出换她来开。结果遇民警检查,女子既没带驾照,同时驾照也过期了。得知要被扣车,车主急了,原来这是他第一次开新车,以前只有开大货车的经验,开小车不熟练。而女子将比照无证驾驶被予以处罚...全文: m.weibo ​
[# # traffic vientiane 【 too poor drops driver technology license expired woman transposition driving [doge]] recently, a woman too called drops the poor driver driving skills, then put forward for her to open. Check, the result in police woman didnt take a drivers license, and a drivers license has expired. That were a car, the owner is nasty, so this new car is the first time he, only open a big truck experience before, car is not skilled. The woman driving without a license will be punished... The full text m. eibo]

最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。

但斌:
    回复@杨维鸿[作揖][心]@杨维鸿明天最后一天,你们B队提前出发,预祝安全完赛并取得好成绩[给力]@但斌[作揖][心]@用户:物理类聚,人以群分,和积极乐观的人在一起,自己也一定是个积极乐观的人[good]
[Reply @ Yang Weihong [bowing] [heart] @ Yang Weihong tomorrow the last day of your team B in advance, I wish safety finish and get good grades [to] @ but bin [bowing] [heart] @ users physical type, a person with group of points, with positive and optimistic people, oneself also must be a positive person [good]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    回复@快乐万山红我的微博是我生活的记录,是我个人的东西,如果打扰到你,建议取消关注!@快乐万山红但总,你是不是每分钟发一条微博啊!我的微博都被你占领了。不要发那么多可以吗@但斌回复@秦山微尘[哈哈][笑cry]@秦山微尘有人还穿裤子,差评[舔屏]
[Happy reply @ Wan Shangong my microblogging is the record of my life, is my personal things, if disturb you, suggest cancel the attention! Happy @ Wan Shangong but always, you send a tweet per minute! My weibo is occupied by you. Dont send so much can you @ but bin reply @ qinshan dust [ha ha] [laugh cry] @ qinshan dust someone still wear pants, bad review [lick screen]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

新浪汽车:
    [允悲][允悲][允悲]@格蘭德ZYW發澤:没有爱玛?雅迪?
[[allow sad] [allow sad] [allow sad] @ ZYW hair ze grand no Emma? Yadi?]

最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。

微博搞笑排行榜:
    给男朋友发消息说我好像怀孕了,他怎么回复 ___________________________________ ​​​
[Send her boyfriend said that Im pregnant, how could he reply ___________________________________]

微博搞笑中心!每天搜罗最搞笑最好玩的微博。关注我,获得每日新鲜笑料!(欢迎合作,投稿)↖(^ω^)↗

汽车之家:
    #晚安家人#买车时,你是倾向于一步到位买高配车型还是买低配回来后再加装配置? ​
[# # good night family buy a car, you are always tend to buy high-end models or buy low match after you come back again with configuration? ​]

汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。

猫扑:
    【异地恋是一种怎样的体验?只有经历过的人才懂![心][泪]】一年只见五次面,你能忍受异地恋吗?经历过异地恋的都知道,这不是一段简单的“旅程”。这一对情侣记录下他们分隔天之后再次相见的情景,既很甜蜜又特别无奈!你有同感吗?tRuRWYK ​
[The long distance relationship is a kind of what kind of experience? Only experienced people understand! [heart] [tears]] only five times a year, can you stand the long distance relationship? Experienced a long distance relationship will know that this is not a simple journey. This couple recorded their separate days later meet again, is very sweet and special helpless! Do you feel the same? tRuRWYK]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。 商务合作-曹先生QQ: ;杨女士QQ:

但斌:
    [作揖][心]@用户:物理类聚,人以群分,和积极乐观的人在一起,自己也一定是个积极乐观的人[good]
[[bowing] [heart] @ users physical type, a person with group of points, with positive and optimistic people, oneself also must be a positive person [good]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    [作揖][心]@快乐投资的小散:但总,有一颗孩童般天真善良的❤ ,相信只有具备这样的天性的人可以做好价值投资,加油,但总![作揖][作揖]
[[bowing] [heart] happy @ investment small scattered but, always have a childlike innocence and good ❤, believe that only have this nature of people can do value investment, come on, but always! [bowing] [bowing]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    为了中欧的荣耀,很多同学克服了自己身体出现的各种困难![赞][作揖]
[In order to the glory of China and the eu, many students overcome the difficulties of your body appear! [who] [bowing]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    是@Belladrops:您参加戈啦~
[Is @ Belladrops you attend dog ~]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    [挤眼]@Jasmine米婷:敢死队[哈哈]
[[eye] @ Jasmine rice d. death squads (ha ha)]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    回复@秦山微尘[哈哈][笑cry]@秦山微尘有人还穿裤子,差评[舔屏]
[Reply @ qinshan dust [ha ha] [laugh cry] @ qinshan dust someone still wear pants, bad review [lick screen]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    继续第三晚的会议,A队队员感谢B队队员为他们赛出好成绩的付出。B队队员要为A股队员搭拆帐篷等……四天公里的赛程,有许多值得赞赏的同学相互帮助和支持的事情,中暑晕倒还有非要继续坚持比赛,不拖中欧后退的同学,让人感动!tRucI ,点出发,完赛在即! ​
[Thank you continue meeting the third night, A team B team for their good results from his game. B team for a-share players set down the tent, etc... Four days km race, there are many worthy of praise students help and support each other, heat stroke fainting and must continue to adhere to the game, not to tow central backward students, let a person touched! TRucI, starting point, will finish soon! ​]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    夕阳下的营地,不远处就是一望无际的大风车 ​
[The camp, the sunset is the endless large wind turbines]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

南方都市报:
    传统的也可以是潮流的[心]
[Traditional can also be a trend of [heart]]

欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博

但斌:
    按照中欧的传统,一般第三天比赛完,要一起拍“光猪照”。[笑cry][哈哈] ​
[According to the tradition of central Europe, generally the third day of the race, together to pig. [laughing cry] (ha ha)]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

但斌:
    今天公里出发前,全体中欧B队成员合影留念! ​
[Km today before you leave, all the central B team members took a group photo! ​]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

猫扑:
    #猫扑夜话# 有没有哪个瞬间时刻,会突然想起你的前任? ​
[# # mop night did a moment, suddenly remind of your predecessor? ​]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。 商务合作-曹先生QQ: ;杨女士QQ:

冷笑话精选:
    嗯@程皓宸:其实最难过的不是分手,而是分手以后,你发现他还是过得挺好,很快有了新的女朋友,有了新的生活。而你还是活在过去,梦中有他。醒来后的那种怅然若失,突然感觉特别对不起自己,不但没有往前走,还把自己弄得一团糟。 ​​​​没有办法和喜欢的人在一起其实是人生的常态。
[Well @ Cheng Haochen it is the most sad is not break up, but after break up, you still find him good, soon have a new girlfriend, a new life. And you still live in the past, my dream with him. Woke up that kind of loss, suddenly feel very sorry, did not go forward, also put himself into this mess. There is no way and favorite people together is the norm of life.]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!

但斌:
    今天公里赛程,大部分时间跑,走了有公里,用时小时分钟。和长庆、还有旅的两个校友还有一个上海交大高金班的同学一起冲线。交大的同学说年就看过我的书,这也是缘分。完成今天的赛程,明天公里就轻松了![爱心][拥抱][强] tRuAJGI ​
[Km race today, most of the time run, walked with km, hours and minutes. And changqing, and the first two brigades alumni Shanghai jiaotong university and a high gold classmates together to finish. Jiaotong university classmates said year they read my book, this is the fate. Complete schedule today, tomorrow, km is easy! [love] [hug] [good] tRuAJGI]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

冷笑话精选:
    😂@光环姑娘的招财猫:课代表!课代表哪去啦[怒骂]
[😂@光环姑娘的招财猫:课代表! Class representative which go to [denounced]]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!

小野妹子学吐槽:
    #越投入越幸福#当年粉刘指导的时候,就被他的付出打动,为了突破直拍的瓶颈,不惜放弃自己早已养成的技法,终于带领国乒站上辉煌。如今变换角色,依然一颗红心热血天下,认真投入的男人自带光环,各位小姐姐,看完视频还不来粉一下?tRujQTqm ​
[# # the into the happiness that powder guidance when liu, was impressed by what he did, in order to breakthrough the bottleneck of play, do not hesitate to give up their already developed techniques, finally lead the ping glory on the site. Now change role, is still a red heart blood all over the world, engaged in men with aura, dear little sister, dont finish see video to powder? tRujQTqm]

图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。

汽车之家:
    #夜福利#激情四射 英菲尼迪Q 款 Eau Rouge concept ​
[# # passionate night welfare Infiniti Q model Eau Rouge concept]

汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。

小米手机:
    今晚讨论一个严肃的问题
你是谁,你为什么而奋斗?

#小米夜探##我是谁我为什么而奋斗# ​

[This evening to discuss a serious issue < br > who you are, why do you fight? < br > < br > # millet night agent # # # I am who I why struggle]

探索黑科技,为发烧而生。

新浪汽车:
    #解码新车#【有槽点也有优势 试驾日产途达】日产在只有途乐支撑硬派SUV的市场中,终于投入了一台中型SUV途达,售价区间为.万元—.万元。大梁底盘搭载.L自吸+AT,分时四驱,在越野能力出众的同时,又显得硬派过头了,照搬纳瓦拉略显低廉的内饰,还有不符合它身份的后轮鼓刹...详情戳链...全文: m.weibo ​
[# decoding new car # 【 slotted also have advantages To drive of nissans way of nissan in the only way support hard SUV market, finally into a midsize SUV way, price range for. Ten thousand yuan. Ten thousand yuan. Girder chassis carry. L self-priming + ats, time-sharing all-wheel-drive, AT the same time in the superior off-road capability, and is hard to send too much, copy the navarre slightly cheap interiors, and does not conform to it as to the identity of the rear wheel drum brake... Poke chain details... The full text m. eibo]

最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。

蔡依林:
    我要發瘋了 ~太美了 ~~ NARS ERDEM 明天來畫看看 tRuuslUX ​
[Im going crazy ~ so beautiful ~ ~ NARS ERDEM to see tRuuslUX tomorrow]

猫扑:
    【丈夫王斌讲述患癌妻子求友撞死始末“我在现场看着她被撞,很痛苦!”】江苏句容女子吴某因癌症晚期不堪折磨,和丈夫王某多次请求朋友徐某某帮助其自杀。徐某某答应后,开车将其撞倒并碾压。被送往医院后,吴某及其家人主动要求出院,最终死于家中。年月日,王某和徐某涉嫌故意杀人罪被起诉。...全文: m.weibo ​
[The husband from about cancer wife occupied by making friends I looked at her and knocked at the scene, very painful! Jurong woman Wu Mou for cancer unbearable torture, and her husband xu wang mou repeatedly asked friends some help its suicide. Xu a promise, after driving caused him to fall and crush. Was taken to hospital after Wu Mou request out of the hospital, and his family finally died from home. (date) (month) (year), wang mou and xu indicted on suspicion of intentional homicide. ... The full text m. eibo]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。 商务合作-曹先生QQ: ;杨女士QQ:

新沐sunshine:
    tRuudQOA ​
[tRuudQOA]

凡心所向,素履所往,生如逆旅,一苇以航

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