TEST BY SENRSL: Poison tongue mouth base teases, YanZheng meter of eight legs are long, cold brother eight pieces o

冷笑话精选：
感人！@记忆似画：好感动，泰国广告怎么都这么走心啊[泪][泪]@活泼的杨薇薇：喜欢最后：你的生命里是什么让你坚持下去！
[Moving! @ memory likes painting the good will move, Thai advertising how all this the heart [tears] [] tears @ lively wei-wei Yang like the last what made you persevere in your life!]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽，颜正腿长一米八，八块腹肌的冷哥就是我！

南方都市报：
【快到中秋了，一起转发，帮这名被拐的孩子找爸妈！】这些孩子都是在全国打拐行动中被警方解救的，曾有孩子被人贩多次转手，他们可能从未有机会在家人怀中撒娇…这名孩子在广东，目前警方正全力寻找孩子亲生父母，如认出孩子请联系警方；家长请带好报警资料，申请亲子鉴定。@公安部打四黑除四害 ...全文： m.weibo
[【 come forward to the Mid-Autumn festival, and help the abducted children find parents!] These children were rescued by the police in the movement in the country, had a child was to traffickers changed hands many times, they may never have the chance to have family arms play the woman... The children in guangdong, at present, police are trying to find her biological parents recognize children please contact the police; Parents please take alarm information, and apply for paternity test. Play four black anti-pest @ the ministry of public security... The full text m. eibo]

欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博

金山夜话博主：
#金山夜话# 听友：本人北方人，和女友谈三年，为了南方女友去南方工作，没靠任何关系，目前大学毕业不到一年，在电视台工作月收入工资，副业（授课），女友马上毕业，没收入，她专业没有我好，不想深造（考研），能力很差，她去不了电视台工作，她愿意跟着我到我工作的城市，我们感情很好。女...全文： m.weibo
[# # jinshan night listening to a friend I am a northerner, talking to his girlfriend for three years, to the south girlfriend to work in the south, not rely on any relationship, the current university graduate in less than a year, work in television monthly income of wages, sideline (teaching), his girlfriend soon graduated, no income, she didnt I good professional, dont want to further study (examination), the ability is very poor, she went to work, not the television she willing to follow me to work in my city, our relationship is very good. Female... The full text m. eibo]

首届中国广电“台帝”，《金山夜话》主持人，记者，作家，著名情感问题专家

小浪同学爱吐槽：
【张柏芝获小儿子Quintus表白声情并茂萌翻网友[憧憬]】#张柏芝#在社交平台分享了一段睡前与儿子小Q的视频，Quintus连喊六个mon，表白张柏芝“很开心有你在我的生命里”，原本一段感人母子对话，网友却被小Q声情并茂的表达方式萌翻↓↓母子俩最后都开怀大笑，温馨十足~tRbfUOz
[【 do Cecilia cheung was the younger son Quintus affectionately of double netizens [hope]] # # Cecilia cheung in social platform to share a bed with son small Q video, Quintus even shouted six mon, I love Cecilia cheung is happy to have you in my life, originally a touching mother-child conversation, netizens are small Q musical expression of turn left left the last laugh, both mother and son sweet ~ tRbfUOz]

曾用名@新浪news，国事家事天下事，事事关心。

但斌：
回复@儒雅教母[作揖][赞][心][鲜花][微风]@儒雅教母人间自有真情在！看着是普通人，他的行动并不普通，好人依然有。
[Reply @ elegance godmother [bowing] [who] [heart] [flowers] [wind] @ elegance godmother own true feelings in human! Look at is the ordinary people, his action was not common, the good is still there.]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

猫扑：
【#大妈用餐厅盘子喂狗# 服务员看到未制止邻桌炸锅】近日，小杨到无锡惠山区一家餐厅吃饭时，邻桌一名大妈竟用餐厅的盘子直接给狗喂食。小杨说，当时服务员看到了却没有制止，让她觉得很不妥。餐厅经理称，已对员工批评教育，事发后对餐具进行了销毁。tRbcPky
[# # Boyle use restaurant dishes feed the dog the waiter see did not stop Lin a fryer 】 recently, xiao Yang to XiHui mountains when eating at a restaurant, at an aunt unexpectedly directly with the restaurants dishes feed the dog. Xiao Yang, said the waiter see stop no breakouts, let her feel very wrong. Restaurant manager said, has criticized the education staff after the incident to the destruction of tableware. tRbcPky]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作：qq：

冷笑话精选：
超暖心的泰国广告短片！
力所能及地帮助别人，奉献自己的爱心，
虽然好人不一定会有所谓的好报，但是……
tRbtsV
[Super warm heart Thai commercials! can do to help others, and giving their love, although good people dont necessarily have the so-called good result, but... tRbtsV]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽，颜正腿长一米八，八块腹肌的冷哥就是我！

但斌：
这个看车的师傅人太好了。我没有拿伞、拖着行李等车，他看到主动过来为我打伞☔️，等了分钟才等到，如果没伞，估计全身淋湿。感谢[心][鲜花]
[The master of the car people too good. I didnt take an umbrella, dragging luggage, such as car, he saw the initiative to open an umbrella for my ☔ ️, wait a minute before, if you dont have an umbrella, estimate the whole body wet. Thank you [heart] [flowers]]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

丑女达人：
我爱吃星巴克的香蕉核桃仁蛋糕，配一杯黑咖啡简直没谁了。热量高我也认了，吃完跑步去！[偷笑]
[I love to eat banana walnut cakes starbucks, with a cup of black coffee who didnt. I also recognize high quantity of heat, eat go running! [laughing]]

兵来将挡，水来土掩，天塌下来老公扛！

小浪同学爱吐槽：
【为了跳广场舞大爷大妈拉绳摆车“圈占”斑马线[黑线]】日晚，天津红桥区某路口，大爷大妈伴着欢快歌曲在斑马线上“载歌载舞”，路口被挂旗的绳子和几辆共享单车围起。附近市民称，大爷大妈每晚都会圈地占路跳舞，有车辆被迫逆行.实拍↓↓tRbLHS
[【 to square dance Elderly men pull on the rope swing car occupy zebra crossing (black line) 】 Sunday evening, tianjin hongqiao district intersection, elderly men and a jaunty song dance on the zebra crossing, intersection are hung flags of the rope and a few Shared bicycle up. Nearby residents said the elderly men and enclosure of road to dance every night, have a vehicle to retrograde. Film left left tRbLHS]

曾用名@新浪news，国事家事天下事，事事关心。

青年时报：
转发微博
[Forwarding microblogging]

新闻热线：工作沟通、广告合作请联系微信：Alex

小浪同学爱吐槽：
【别人家的大学能K歌！郑大“食堂KTV”风靡校园[憧憬]】暑假后，郑州大学一食堂进行了翻修：装上K歌设备，备受学生欢迎！知情人称其实食堂是外包，装修花了多万。郑大后勤管理处也回应，这就是一个小舞台，并非专作唱歌的KTV...先来听一下↓↓怎么感觉耳朵瞎了[二哈]tRbUcX
[The other peoples university to K song! Chong dining halls KTV fashionable campus [hope]] after the summer vacation, a canteen for zhengzhou university renovated mount karaoke equipment, the students are welcome! Close to the person actually canteen is outsourcing, spent more than decoration. Chong logistics management office also respond, this is a small stage, is not designed for sing KTV... How to listen to the first left left ears blind [two ha] tRbUcX feeling]

曾用名@新浪news，国事家事天下事，事事关心。

一块去旅行：
#Taki日签# 总有一天，你会站在最亮的地方，活成自己曾经渴望的模样。
[# # Taki day to sign one day, you will stand in the brightest place, live into he had desired. ]

我们的征途是星辰大海，愿做你旅程中的灯塔，一路照亮你前行。合作QQ：

新浪汽车：
#解码新车#[doge]微跑来了！年产万辆，你觉得怎么样？tRycHu
[# decoding # [doge] micro ran to the car! Annual output of cars, what do you think? tRycHu]

最新鲜的汽车资讯；
最快速的新车报道；
最全面的车型数据；
最及时的车型报价；
最丰富的汽车活动。

新浪新闻客户端：
还是在一旁默默吃瓜吧。。[吃惊]
[Eat the melon. Or on the side quietly. [surprised]]

只想做一只人见人爱的客户端

汽车之家：
#家家新闻# #宝马X#【或与M共享动力总成全新宝马X M谍照】日前，有国外媒体拍摄到一组较低伪装的全新宝马X M路试谍照。新车或与M共享动力总成，搭载一台.T直列六缸双涡轮增压发动机，最大功率或在马力左右。
[# every news # # BMW X# [or Shared with M powertrain new BMW X M photos 】 a few days ago, a foreign media captured by a group of lower road test new BMW X M spy in disguise. New or Shared with M powertrain, carry a. T inline six-cylinder turbocharged engine, maximum power or around horsepower. ]

汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务，以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容，多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者，是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。

猫扑：
【男子踢特警录视频发朋友圈[怒]被治安处罚】日，黑龙江一名特警支队巡防人员执勤时，他的朋友王某某恰好路过，在其不知情的情况下，从背后踹了一脚并拍视频发朋友圈。目前公安机关已对王某某做出治安处罚，其本人也通过微信发布道歉信。tRrTV
[【 men play special police recorded video hair friends [anger] was public security penalties, heilongjiang a swat team guard personnel on duty, his friend wang mou just passing by, in its unwittingly, kick the from behind and shoot video circle of friends. At present, the public security organ has a make public security penalties in wang mou, its himself through WeChat issued an apology letter. tRrTV]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作：qq：

小浪同学爱吐槽：
【薛之谦父亲受访否认要求抱孙子：大家协商拿掉的孩子】昨日李雨桐放出父亲与薛之谦对话的录音再度引发热议，有网友扒出，在录音分秒前后可以听到有人讲道“怀孕七个月”，而后薛之谦小声说了一句“对不起”↓↓至于是否是薛之谦爸爸想抱孙子才要的孩子，薛父这样回应↓↓tRbAaww
[Memory father questioned deny demands have grandchildren that you negotiate remove child 】 yesterday released tung father dialogue with memory recording again triggered heated debate, some netizens pulled out, before and after the recording minutes could hear someone say seven months pregnant, whispered, and then let you go for a sorry left left as to whether my show dad want to have grandchildren to children, Xue Fu responded like this left left tRbAaww]

曾用名@新浪news，国事家事天下事，事事关心。

南方都市报：
【中国光伏厉害了：最大项目每天产能，足够一个城市用一年！】在中国，每小时就有一座足球场面积大小的太阳能电池板被安装上。中国已成为世界节能和新能源利用第一大国。年，水电、风电、核电和天然气等清洁能源消费占比已达.%，没有哪个国家能在如此短时间、用如此大的魄力，兑现绿色发展承诺...全文： m.weibo
[[Chinese photovoltaic much biggest project capacity every day, a city with enough year!] In China, have a every hour be installed solar panels on the size of a football stadium. China has become the worlds energy conservation and new energy use of the first power. Years, hydropower, wind power, nuclear power and natural gas and other clean energy consumption proportion reached. %, no country can in such a short time, and with so much energy, and green development commitments... The full text m. eibo]

欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博

但斌：
发表了博文《沃尔玛慌了，家乐福坐不住了！这家奇（niu）葩（bi）超市终于来中国了》tRbwg
[Published a blog post the panic wal-mart, carrefour sit! The odd (niu) yuan (bi) supermarket finally come to China, tRbwg]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

优酷：
#电视剧将军在上# 怀瑾握瑜，一路盛放，祝福小郡王@盛一伦生日快乐，幸福安康！[蛋糕][蛋糕][蛋糕] #盛一伦生日快乐# tRoyiZV
[# # general TV in pregnant with the jin zhou yu, cheng fang, happy birthday to little king county @ put an Aaron, happy life! [cake] [cake] [cake] # put an Aaron, happy birthday # tRoyiZV]

小浪同学爱吐槽：
【不识字、不会吹气...酒驾男遇交警竟胡搅蛮缠[费解]】太原交警例行检查时，一车主面对酒精检测仪，先强调自己没喝酒，后又说气不够不能吹，软磨硬泡吹了气结果为酒驾...这下他承认了饮酒事实，可没一会儿他又自称没上过学，连名字都不会写...你猜交警会如何机智应对↓↓tRbVCX
[【 illiterate, dont blow... drunk driving men encounter traffic police unexpectedly importune [difficult]] taiyuan traffic police routine inspection, the owner in the face of alcohol tester, stressed that he didnt drink first, after said not enough cant blow gas, the impending nuptials, blowing gas results for drunk driving... The fact that he had admitted drinking under, but not for a while he claims to not go to school, even the name cant write... How do you guess the traffic police will wit cope with left left tRbVCX]

曾用名@新浪news，国事家事天下事，事事关心。

微博汽车：
#美出了界# 我觉得都可以啊 [笑cry]@胡永平-我的技能是吃饭睡觉打孩子…有这个分类吗？有的话我要参与活动拿第一名！@微博汽车
[# # beauty out of the world I think can [laugh cry] @ Hu Yongping - my skills is to eat sleeping child... With this classification? So I want to participate in activities first! @ weibo car]

这个官微有意思，有车没车不重要，带你装逼带你飞

金山夜话博主：
#金山夜话# 听友：男生老是偷瞄女生很多次，突然间对视眼睛是温柔的，对视很久，这什么情况？金山：这是你有情况了！正所谓，情人眼里出西施，情人眼里也出潘安！
[# # jinshan night listening to a friend boy kept glancing at the girl many times, suddenly eyes is gentle eyes, eye for a long time, this situation? Jinshan this is you have a case! What is called, the eyes of the beholder, also the lovers eyes m. pei! ]

首届中国广电“台帝”，《金山夜话》主持人，记者，作家，著名情感问题专家

新浪汽车：
真、载人大疆，新载具，除了续航能力之外貌似也没毛病~！
[True, xinjiang of National Peoples Congress, the new vehicle, in addition to the battery life seems also no problem ~!]

最新鲜的汽车资讯；
最快速的新车报道；
最全面的车型数据；
最及时的车型报价；
最丰富的汽车活动。

猫扑：
【斤胖妈惊险生子医生抢救令宝宝起死回生[心]】身高公分，怀孕时体重竟到达多斤，恩施产妇方冬梅创下了湖北产妇体重记录。月日，方冬梅通过剖腹产在生下一名.斤的男婴。由于体重太胖呼吸困难，造成宝宝缺血缺氧，生下后没有呼吸，无论如何拍打也没有反应。但医生没有放弃，坚持抢救，...全文： m.weibo
[[jin mom thrilling children A doctor to rescue the baby back [heart]] cm tall and pregnancy weight has reached more than jins, enshi maternal dong-mei fang set the hubei maternal weight record. June , in giving birth to a dong-mei fang by caesarean section. Jins baby boy. Baby ischemia due to weight too fat breathing difficulties, lack of oxygen, after giving birth to not breathing, no matter what pat and no response. But the doctor didnt give up, adhere to the rescue,... The full text m. eibo]

猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作：qq：

平安北京：
【全国公安百佳刑警名单出炉有神探也有打拐女警】月日，备受社会各界关注的“热血铸剑·丹心卫民”全国公安百佳刑警推选宣传活动评选结果正式揭晓，揭晓仪式于当晚在京举行。北京市公安局朝阳分局刑侦支队副支队长秦文志等位刑警当选全国公安百佳刑警。北京市公安局怀柔分局刑侦支队王起和等刑警...全文： m.weibo
[The national public security top list of Interpol has released a great detective crackdown policewoman 】, February nds attention from all walks of life blood cast jian educational WeiMin national public security top elected campaign officially revealed the results of Interpol, awards ceremony held in Beijing that night. The Beijing municipal public security bureau of chaoyang branch of forensic team vice division marshal Qin Wenzhi allelic elected to the national public security policemen jasmine Interpol. Huairou branch of the Beijing municipal public security bureau criminal investigation detachment Wang Qi and Interpol, such as... The full text m. eibo]

这里是北京市公安局官方微博，在这里您可以了解到北京警方的新闻资讯。欢迎您给我们提出意见和建议。

汽车之家：
#家有二十四节气##秋分#
昼夜温差逐日加大，家人们，记得添衣、保养生息。然后深呼吸，开朗拥抱秋的来临迎接与把握年倒计时天
[# # # # home has twenty-four solar terms autumnal equinox increased day by day, day and night temperature difference family, remember to add clothes, maintenance. Then take a deep breath and cheerful embrace the coming of autumn To meet and hold year countdown days]

优酷：
#锋味优酷#同学们期盼已久的谢大厨登场啦！想“蟹”逅霆锋？[爱你]请猛戳这里：tRyei
[# # feng flavor youku classmates came on as a long-awaited thank chef! Think of crab Hou whether front? [love] you please stab here tRyei]

但斌：
转：年月日周六读报！一切美好从❤️
、中国五岁儿童每天刷牙两次及以上的比例仅为.%，成人也只有.%。岁儿童与岁儿童口腔问题的咨询检查就诊率均在%左右，“牙疼不是病”的观念耽误孩子牙病诊断治疗。(网易新闻)

、世界旅游及旅行理事会(WTTC)预计，未来年中国旅游市场平均每年...全文： m.weibo
[ (date) (month) (year) reading newspapers on Saturday. All good from ❤ ️ , China more than five years old child to brush your teeth twice a day and the proportion was only about. %, adults only. %. Years, children and childrens oral health problems consulting check JiuZhenLv all around %, the notion of toothache is not ill delay children dental disease diagnosis and treatment. (netease news) , the world tourism and travel council (WTTC) is expected, Chinas tourism market in the future a year on average... The full text m. eibo]

一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人

青年时报：
转发微博
[Forwarding microblogging]

新闻热线：工作沟通、广告合作请联系微信：Alex

薛蛮子：
转发微博
[Forwarding microblogging]

天使投资人薛蛮子商业计划书请发送至——charlesxue@一

汽车之家：
#家家新闻# #宝骏#【售价.-.万元宝骏新车型上市】日前，宝骏汽车官方宣布，宝骏三款新车型正式上市。新车型匹配的是AMT变速箱，并搭载.L自然吸气发动机，售价区间为.-.万元。
[# every news # # # baojun 【 price. -. Ten thousand yuan Baojun new models listed 】 recently, baojun car it was officially announced that baojun three listed on the new model. AMT gearbox is match the new model, and carry. L naturally aspirated engine, price range for. -. Ten thousand yuan. ]

冷笑话精选：
这换钱骗术……
幸亏这收银员尽责！
tRBSRE
[This money deception... thanks to the cashier responsible! tRBSRE]

毒舌嘴贱会吐槽，颜正腿长一米八，八块腹肌的冷哥就是我！

一块去旅行：
日本旅行攻略 | 每一张都是特别特别用心写的 [污]少女心爆棚的自由行之旅开始啦🤤希望能对去日本玩的伙伴们有帮助（比心💕）作者：YesFairyY
[RiBenLvHangGongLve | MeiYiZhangDouShiTeBieTeBieYongXinXieDe [污]少女心爆棚的自由行之旅开始啦🤤希望能对去日本玩的伙伴们有帮助（比心💕）作者：YesFairyY ]