冷笑话精选:
女主人怀孕了……
家里的哈士奇只让男主人摸肚子,
其他亲戚一律不让!![二哈]
tRQEFyHU
[The hostess is pregnant... < br > home huskies just let the male host to touch the belly, < br > other relatives shall not let!!!!! [two ha] < br > tRQEFyHU]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!
【住院边吸氧边偷抽烟 老烟枪烧成“包公脸”[跪了]】武汉的陈大伯在进行吸氧治疗时突然发出一声惨叫。医护人员赶到病房发现,陈大伯整个脸部都被烧得污黑,俨然一张包公脸!而护士随后在他的口袋里发现了烟和打火机...希望这次“被黑脸”的经历能让更多人引以为戒[并不简单]↓↓tRQEkIW
[The oxygen while stealing smoking in hospital Heavy smoker firing bao face] [kneeling] wuhan Chen Dabo during oxygen therapy suddenly let out a scream. Paramedics arrived at the ward, found that Chen Dabo whole face were to corrupt black, peremptory a bao face! The nurse then found smoke in his pocket and lighter... Hope that this black face experience will let more people to take [] are not simple left left tRQEkIW]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。青年时报:
【“老赖”欠了年的万终于执行到位了,但申请执行人却“查无此人”了……】年前,龙游的老季欠下老何多万没有还,老季就没了踪影。这么多年里,老何等老季还钱,一直等到他都不抱希望了。但是去年,老季偷偷跑回衢州安度晚年,还带回自己多年的积蓄。这笔存款立即被法院冻结。但此时,法院发现...全文: m.weibo
[The LaoLai owe the thousands years finally implementation in place, but the execution applicant has no such person anymore... Years ago, the longyou owes more than csi have old season, the old season is gone. For so many years, how old the old season also money, have no hope until he. But last year, old quarter, sneak back to quzhou to spend their twilight years, also brought back his savings for many years. This money was frozen by the court immediately. But at this point, the court found that... The full text m. eibo]
新闻热线: 工作沟通、广告合作请联系微信:Alex冷笑话精选:
知道什么叫真正的绝望吗?[允悲]
tRQEDzTb
[Know what is the real despair? [allow sad] < br > tRQEDzTb]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!猫扑:
没长残,挺好看的[喵喵]
[Not long, look good [meow]]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:王小川:
今日,搜狗搜索与牛津大学出版社在北京举行签约仪式。合作后,搜狗搜索旗下的搜狗翻译APP、搜狗词典APP、搜狗英文搜索等英文服务类产品将引入牛津权威词典内容,为用户带来更专业、权威、地道的翻译及查词服务。
[Today, sogou search with Oxford University press, held a signing ceremony in Beijing. After cooperation, sogou searchs APP, sogou sogou translation dictionary APP, sogou search and other English authority will introduce the Oxford dictionary content service products, for users to bring more professional, authoritative, idiomatic translation and searching and service. ]
好奇地活着梁詠琪:
嘻嘻!真期待!生日快樂親愛的心潔!祝妳和妳一家健康平安!幸福快樂!@李心洁哎哟哟!谢谢芸芸,千里来相聚的时光又快到了,太期待了。
[Hee hee! Really looking forward to! Happy birthday to my dear heart jie! I wish you a healthy peace with you! Happiness! @ li xinjie ouch! Many people thank you thousands of miles to meet the time is coming again, expect too much.]
gigileung.hk金山夜话博主:
#金山夜话# 听友:我博士学历,女,他,初中学历,但长相英俊,工作一般,技术工人,但对我很好,家里也算不门当户对,他家条件一般,这样的我们能结婚吗?会幸福吗?金山:其实你的资本就是你的博士学历,只要你觉得不重要,它就一钱不值。颜值确实是硬件,只要你看重,它比泰山还重!
[# # jinshan night listen to friends my doctoral degree, female, he, junior high school degree, but handsome and work, skilled workers, but for me is very good, is not suitable in the home, his family conditions, so that we can get married? Will be happy? Jinshan your capital is actually your doctoral degree, as long as you dont feel important, it is worthless. Level is indeed hardware in appearance, as long as you care about, it is weightier than mount tai. ]
首届中国广电“台帝”,《金山夜话》主持人,记者,作家,著名情感问题专家南方都市报:
#下班分享#巴西混血小姐姐Luciana Zogbi,串烧翻唱《Despacito》《Shape Of You》《Faded》《Treat You Better》四首大热单曲。一人分饰两角自带和声效果,好好听![心] tRQNTirv
[# # from work to share Brazil half-blood little sister Luciana Zogbi, cover the Despacito spun the Shape Of You Faded Treat You Better four big hot singles. One person ACTS the role of two horns effect bring harmony, good good to listen! [heart] tRQNTirv]
欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博Origins悦木之源:
#悦木之源 我要试水#明明可以靠颜却偏要靠才华,摄影师的身份之外,@洛凡AdamEve 现在还是一名作家。踏遍千山看过的风景写进书里,新一年,就让Origins陪在你身边与你一同再次启程,试水更多可能!
[The source of # yue wood I want to test the waters # can obviously by yan slants however want to rely on talent, the identity of the photographer, @ los AdamEve now or a writer. Scour qianshan mountain scenery seen written in the book, the New Year, let Origins to accompany in your side with you again, try water may be more!]
Origins悦木之源:有人只见植物草木;我们却见突破万物;你会看见悦目肌肤!汽车之家:
#家家新闻##小鹏汽车#【将于春季上市 小鹏G实车内饰谍照曝光】日前,有国内媒体曝光了一组小鹏G的实车内饰谍照,根据谍照所示,新车搭载了一块超大尺寸的液晶显示屏,并取消了传统的实体按键,看起来科技感十足。据悉,新车将于今年春季在国内亮相,并同期上市。tRQEgXHO
[# every news # # # xiao peng car 【 will be available in the spring Xiao peng G real vehicle interior spy exposure 】 recently, with the domestic media exposure of a set of xiao peng G real car interior photos, according to the photos shown, new car pick up a piece of big size LCD screen, and cancel the traditional entity key, look technology feels dye-in-the-wood. The new car will make its debut this spring in the country, and in the same period. tRQEgXHO]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。新浪汽车:
#老司机课堂#看来,是时候请思域出马了[doge]
[Old driver class # #, it seems, it is time to please the civic again [doge]]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。青年时报:
【杭州一岁阿姨自学针灸治疗关节炎,结果把自己扎成了气胸……】张阿姨很注重养生保健,平时也喜欢上网学习新技能。前段时间,她就新学习了扎针灸,还给自己扎上了,没想到,效果还挺好的。上周,她肩膀因为关节炎难受,就又给自己扎起来针灸,没想到,这一扎,反而将自己扎进了医院……...全文: m.weibo
[【 acupuncture treatment of arthritis, hangzhou old aunt self-study results in pneumothorax himself... 】 Aunt zhang is very pay attention to health care, usually also like to surf the net to learn new skills. Recently, she is a new learning acupuncture and moxibustion, which also myself, have never thought, the effect is quite good. Last week, because her shoulder arthritis, acupuncture, and to give yourself up unexpectedly, instead of the firm, will himself into the hospital... ... The full text m. eibo]
新闻热线: 工作沟通、广告合作请联系微信:Alex南方都市报:
【年关易过,年龄关难过?】很多女性觉得越长大越不想过年,尤其是要面对亲戚朋友的唠叨、同龄人对比、父母的催婚,你是否也有这样的感受?年龄增长的意义,在于在时光中发现和认知自己。看看这三位女性的春节故事,希望你过一个不一样的春节 #无惧年龄#
tRQRJyiz
[The year that will not endure, age shut sad? Many women feel more grow up more dont want to Chinese New Year, especially in the face of relatives and friends to nag, peers contrast, parents urge marriage, whether you also have such feeling? The significance of age, is found in time and cognitive himself. Take a look at the Spring Festival story of three women, hope you have a different Spring Festival # # fearless age < br > tRQRJyiz]
欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博微博汽车:
#趣你的汽车# 你最看不惯什么样的停车方式?
tRQErSRL
[# # interest your car parking you most dont like what kind of way? < br > tRQErSRL]
这个官微有意思,有车没车不重要,带你装逼带你飞MIUI:
#MIUI# ,出发!
[# MIUI#, set off! ]
MIUI米柚,基于Android深度定制,坚持每周升级持续进化,成为你离不开的贴心伙伴!汽车之家:
辛辛苦苦一年了,你的年终奖还满意吗?汽车之家送你年终奖,只要集齐张碎片,即可抽取丰厚礼品哦!tRQEYqV
[Hard for a year, are satisfied with your annual bonus? Car home send you annual bonus, as long as the collected debris, can extract rich gift oh! tRQEYqV]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。优酷:
#锋味#果然有颜值的人都是任性的,请两位歌手谢霆锋@锋味 @李治廷 开始你们的表演,[笑cry][笑cry]优酷君送上一张碟,请打上三天三夜,靴靴~[摊手]
tRQEYy
[# # feng flavor of appearance level is wayward, please two singer Nicholas tse @ front taste @ never know to start your performance, [laugh cry] [laugh cry] youku jun on a single disc, please in three days and three nights, boot ~ [stand hand] < br > tRQEYy]
猫扑:
【撞倒小学生想开溜 两名热心司机加速夹停肇事车】近日,在九江一个路口,一辆小车撞倒一名小学生后,想要逃跑。两名目击这一幕的热心司机加速追上去,将肇事者拦停,要他回去找被撞的小学生。可找了十分钟也没找到,肇事司机说他会自己报警处理。然而,一天多过去,肇事司机却并没有报警处理,几个人...全文: m.weibo
[【 hit the pupils want to run away Two enthusiastic driver speed clip trouble-causing car 】 recently, stop a crossroads in jiujiang, a car knocked down a primary school student, want to escape. The zeal of two witnessed this scene driver go faster, the perpetrators stop stop, he went back for it to be hit the pupils. Did not find ten minutes can be found, the driver said he will report to the police. However, more than a day in the past, the driver did not alarm processing, a few people... The full text m. eibo]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:微博汽车:
#大V聊车# 中型SUV对比,两辆车都是顶配,真的还挺难分出上下。但是昂科威刚换了AT,有点心动!
[Talk about car # # big V midsize SUV contrast, two cars are top-of-the-line, really is quite difficult to separate. But the enclave adata changed the AT, a little enchanted!]
这个官微有意思,有车没车不重要,带你装逼带你飞微博搞笑排行榜:
[心]@霜雪知冬的煎饼果子 超喜欢!太棒了这感觉
[[heart] @ frost and snow of winter pancake fruit Super like it! Thats great the feeling]
微博搞笑中心!每天搜罗最搞笑最好玩的微博。关注我,获得每日新鲜笑料!(欢迎合作,投稿)↖(^ω^)↗南方都市报:
【口角纠纷发展成大打出手,女子怒怼:东北了不起啊?被扇耳光…】据新闻晨报,月日,海南海口某商场门口,一对情侣与两女子疑因开车按喇叭起了争执,短发女子听到对方说东北人到这作威作福后,怒扇对方耳光,随后双方破口大骂并大打出手。当地警方随后介入调查。另据南国都市报,民警称,他们查看...全文: m.weibo
[【 tiff disputes developed into fights, woman nu Dui northeast great? Be slapped... 】 According to the morning news, June , hainan haikou some store doorway, a couple with two women suspected of driving over the horn, short hair woman hear each other said after the northeast people to the Lord, nu slapping each others face, then the swearing and fights. The local police to investigate later. According to the south metropolis daily, police said they view... The full text m. eibo]
欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博新浪汽车:
#出行生活#【网红男子地下通道直播弹唱,深夜坐奔驰离开:朋友的车】 近日,北京朝阳区一名男子坐在地铁过道内直播弹吉他弹唱,他说每天直播到晚上点。直播时,他说直播后是走回家,但实际上他坐着奔驰车离开了[闭嘴]。tRQQrZH
[# # travel life 【 red man live underground passage bards, sat mercedes-benz left in the middle of the night a friends car] recently, the Beijing chaoyang district a man sit subway aisle live in guitar playing, he said some live every day to night. Live broadcast, he said that after is walking home, but in fact he was sitting with Mercedes Benz left [up]. tRQQrZH]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。汽车之家:
#家家新闻##东芝#【东芝超级电池 充电分钟可行驶公里】日前据外媒报道,东芝官方宣布已经成功研发新一代车用锂离子电池(简称:SCiB)。此技术是基于年东芝推出的超级锂离子电池而进行的升级版,其具备能量密度高,充电效率快等优点。升级后,该电池技术只需充电分钟就能达到%的电量,而传...全文: m.weibo
[# every news # # # Toshiba Toshiba super battery minutes driving km 】 【, according to foreign media reported that the Toshiba official has successfully developed a new generation of automotive lithium-ion battery (hereinafter referred to as the SCiB). This technology is based on years of Toshiba introduced the lithium ion battery of the updated version, it has high energy density and charging efficiency, etc. After the upgrade, the battery charging technology just minutes can reach % of power, and the... The full text m. eibo]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。猫扑:
【女子年替弟还债多万 老公一气之下远走国外】面对弟弟朝不保夕的生活和妈妈的哀求,杭州李女士年间陆续替弟还债多万,最终导致自己的丈夫远走异国他乡…都说女儿是父母的贴心小棉袄,但依然会出现这种被原生家庭不停盘剥的“女儿奴”,如果是你,你会怎么办?tRQERBoc
[The woman more than for his brothers debts Husband angry face life brother already far walk abroad 】 mother and cried out, hangzhou in succession from Ms. Li for his brother more than paying off debts, eventually led to their own husbands leave home... All said her daughter is the apple of parents eye, but will still appear in the form of native families keep exploiting slave daughter, if you, what would you do? tRQERBoc]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:优酷:
#终极一班#原来雷婷@曾沛慈 与蓝斯洛@马振桓Evan 私底下这么欢脱,拍肩膀,说笑话,好不热闹。蓝斯洛戏外完全是就是青春期大男孩啊,只要呼吸雷婷的空气都会被diss那是种什么样的体验?[笑而不语]
tRQEeee
[# #d originally kenii @ lei with blue, @ Ma Zhenhuan Evan privately so huan, clap shoulder, tell jokes, very lively. Blue, theater is completely is adolescence big boy, as long as breathing kenii air will be diss thats kind of what kind of experience? [smiling without a word] < br > tRQEeee]
一块去旅行:
蠢萌蠢萌的三文鱼巨无霸饭团
[Stupid of stupid of salmon big MAC rice balls]
我们的征途是星辰大海,愿做你旅程中的灯塔,一路照亮你前行。合作QQ:小野妹子学吐槽:
@稻草包狸猫:女朋友了解一下[doge]@但须知赶路要紧:护肤化妆了解一下@Shirley__轮白:追星了解一下@丛丛从虫虫:摄影了解一下@植物课代表:lo装 jk制服 汉服 了解一下
[@ straw bale civet cats girlfriend look at [doge] @ but guidelines on matters skin makeup look at @ Shirley__ round white make track for a star know @ yellowing from insect insect photography class representative understand the @ plants lo jk hanfu know about the uniform]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。但斌:
[心][握手]@但行正路不问前程:[赞],但总好人好报!比基金更牛的是但总的爱心[笑cry][赞] @但斌回复@扬韬一年的数字[心]实际应该比这多一点[鲜花]@扬韬今天听到一个说消息,但斌先生为慈善事业的捐款达到了多万元。请问但总,这是一年的数字还是累计的数字?有爱心的投资家,为您点赞!
[Shake hands [heart] [] @ future but dont ask, dont do the right way [great], but all the good things happen! More cattle than fund is but the total love [laugh cry] [who] @ but bin reply @ Yang towers year Numbers [heart] actually should be a little more than this [flowers] @ Yang towers to hear a said today, but Mr Bin for charity donations reached more than ten thousand yuan. Excuse me, but always, this is the number and the total number of the year? Caring capitalists, thumb up for you!]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@飘摇三毛谢谢[心][鲜花]@飘摇三毛如果你真的有才华,有广阔的胸襟,愿意努力奋斗,不嫉妒他人的的财富,不无所事事,不整天抱怨自己的生活,不找理由逃避责任,我们就有可能改变自己的命运与现状。 相当受教🙏🙏🙏@但斌回复@小散谢谢[握手][心][鲜花]
[@ three hair swaying thanks [heart] [flowers] @ shake three hair if youre really talented, has a broad mind, willing to work hard, dont envy other peoples wealth, not idle, dont complain about all day long life, dont find a reason to avoid responsibility, we are likely to change their own destiny and present situation. 相当受教🙏🙏🙏@但斌回复@小散谢谢[握手][心][鲜花]]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@TZ[心][鲜花]@TZ有钱是能力,眼光,机遇等综合因素造就。 有钱愿意捐助给公益或慈善,那是境界,格局,胸怀!
[Reply @ TZ [heart] [flowers] @ TZ is ability, rich taste, create opportunities and other comprehensive factors. Willing to charity donations to public welfare or rich, that is, landscape, bosom!]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@扬韬谢谢老兄!绵薄之力,到现场常常也有无助感![泪]@扬韬回复@但斌高山仰止!
[Reply @ young baby thanks dude! Contribute to the, to the site often also a sense of helplessness! [] tears @ young baby reply @ but wb down!]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
回复@阿超谢谢[握手][心][鲜花]@阿超但总 好人有好报!时间的玫瑰🌹 读后感触颇深!读的晚了!@但斌回复@扬韬一年的数字[心]实际应该比这多一点[鲜花]
[Super thanks o reply @ [shake hands] [heart] [flowers] o @ super deserved but always good man! 时间的玫瑰🌹 读后感触颇深! Read the night! @ but bin reply @ Yang towers year Numbers [heart] actually should be a little more than this (flowers)]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人但斌:
东方港湾融通资本汉景港湾号与中融东方港湾期(融新),获得中华好私募——三年期和五年期两项产品奖。[鲜花]👏
[Eastern bay financing capital han jing in the harbour, and combines eastern bay (integrating new), obtain the good private - three-year and five-year two product award. [鲜花]👏 ]
一个普通、真诚、热爱生活的人玩转instagram:
你最想和谁一起窝在这里? tRQETNH
[Who would you most like to nest together here? tRQETNH]
带你玩转最美妙最有趣的instagram~(品牌合作请私信,提供简介,谢谢!)
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