卢健生:
下次试试No England这招。[哈哈][哈哈][哈哈]@盧安迪我有一個朋友的朋友,華人,在美國開車,違反交通規則,被警察截停問話。無論警察說什麼,他都說 “no England”,最終警察放棄了,放他走了。
[Next time try No England this recruit. (ha ha)ha ha @ Lu Andi ha ha, I have a friend of a friend, Chinese, driving in the United States, in violation of traffic rules, was stopped by the police for questioning. No matter what the police say, he said, no England, the police finally gave up, and let him go.]
Z CAM, CEO
我早前果断地选择退订。[doge]@来去之间@硬哥据说美国第一批车主在闹事,Model 从今年底延期到明年初交车的话,那些人会少拿很多补贴,但没人选择退订……
[Earlier I resolutely choose to unsubscribe. [doge] @ come and go between @ hard brother is said to be the first batch of owners in the riot, the Model car from the end of the delay to the beginning of next year, who will take a lot less subsidies, but no one choose unsubscribe...]
Z CAM, CEO小野妹子学吐槽:
最右秀住了!@Lemon叶色阑珊来都来了,求你快走。人都死了,你去陪他。大过年的,就你添堵,孩子还小,我帮你教 tRYPmdFh
[The right show live! @ Lemon leaf color decayed to came, please quickly go. People are dead, you go to accompany him. Big New Years day, and you tian du, the child still small, teaching tRYPmdFh me to help you]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。小浪同学爱吐槽:
【“双性人”过了年异样人生 曾被逼墙角扒裤子[伤心]】她的身份证的性别一栏显示为“女”,染色体也为女性的“XX 型”,但她出生时身上就有男性生殖器...多年来,她曾经按照女孩的身份生活,但还是越长越像男孩,也曾因身份被发现经历很多难以启齿的“屈辱”↓↓tRYzWMS
[【 bisexual over the years new life was forced to corner steak pants [sad]] sex column shows her id card for female, chromosome also for women XX, but when she was born with a male genital... Over the years, she once according to life of the girls identity, but still more long more like a boy, was also was found through a lot of difficult for identity humiliation left left tRYzWMS down]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。微博搞笑排行榜:
农村老太太讲述幸福的国外之旅,太生动有趣了![笑cry]tRYzXYqE
[Rural old woman happy trip abroad, too interesting! [laughing cry] tRYzXYqE]
微博搞笑中心!每天搜罗最搞笑最好玩的微博。关注我,获得每日新鲜笑料!(欢迎合作,投稿)↖(^ω^)↗冷笑话精选:
所以才说强行撩妹最为致命……[允悲]
tRYzqAV
[So we say forcibly pulled the younger sister of the most deadly... [allow sad] < br > tRYzqAV]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!新浪汽车:
谁来解读一下[doge]
[Who is going to interpret the [doge]]
最新鲜的汽车资讯;
最快速的新车报道;
最全面的车型数据;
最及时的车型报价;
最丰富的汽车活动。猫扑:
学会了
[Learned to]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:巴曙松:
正在进行时:月号晚,沈建光博士主讲第期北大汇丰金融前沿讲堂,主题为《后十九大的全球和中国经济展望》,全场座无虚席。深圳,北大汇丰
[Ongoing months later, Dr Shen jianguang, on the first phase of Peking University HSBC finance front hall, the theme of large after the global and Chinas economic outlook, the packed stadium. Shenzhen, Peking University HSBC]
金融学者、博士生导师,中国银行业协会首席经济学家、哥伦比亚大学商学院高级访问学者小野妹子学吐槽:
沙发!速度调最大,眼睛都能跟着节奏,前后左右一个快动作 tRYzpto
[The sofa! Adjustable maximum speed, eyes can follow the rhythm, a fast action tRYzpto around]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。优酷:
圈粉无数的@任重 曾消失大家视野很长一段时间,引发坊间无数猜想,他干什么去了?在接受#星月对话#@王江月 采访时,他给出了真相,原来他去美国留学了!本期节目听任重讲述他爆笑的“美囧”生活,反思过往的“撩妹”套路,坦陈“一个演员的心路历程”,还首次曝光了他美国留学的毕业作品……从演员到导...全文: m.weibo
[Circle powder countless @ long had disappeared people field of vision for a long time, there are numerous guess, what did he go? Leaves in a # # @ Wang Jiangyue dialogue An interview, he gave the truth, that he went to study in the United States! This program to be telling a joke off beauty of life, to reflect on past liao younger sister, confesses an actors journey, is also exposed his graduate study in the United States for the first time... From the actors to guide... The full text m. eibo]
一块去旅行:
老北京的韵味[心]
[The charm of old Beijing [heart]]
我们的征途是星辰大海,愿做你旅程中的灯塔,一路照亮你前行。合作QQ:MIUI:
#MIUI#快如闪电,在让手机变得更快的同时,加入动态图标,当大部分系统应用退出时,都会有不同的动效展示,让每一次退出变得轻盈灵动。你喜欢这个设计吗?
[As quick as lightning, # MIUI# while keep the cell phone becomes faster, to join the dynamic icon, when the application exits, most systems will have different dynamic effect show, let every exit becomes lightsome clever. Do you like this design? ]
MIUI米柚,基于Android深度定制,坚持每周升级持续进化,成为你离不开的贴心伙伴!薛蛮子:
谢谢@刺猬--hedgehog@薛蛮子 我关注你多年,即使在你最不如意,微博被封期间都没对你取关,执着地等你回来商家轻轻松松一句“走法律途径”,作为消费者,维权成本高昂,不经历过无法想像;,作为商家,事发后没有任何实质性人文关怀,完全不问顾客伤情,后期完全不作任何回应,在态度上非常消极。
[Thank you @ hedgehog - hedgehog @ xue barbarian I focus on you for many years, even when you are most unhappy, weibo blocked during didnt take off for you, persistent waiting for you to come back to the businessman easily a legal, as consumers, rights protection, the high cost of not experienced unimaginable; , as a businessman, without any real humanistic care after the incident, completely ignore customer injury, later dont make any response, in a very negative attitude.]
天使投资人薛蛮子 商业计划书请发送至——charlesxue@一薛蛮子:
必须地表处理好防滑,否则老年人倒车骨折后果不堪设想
[Have to deal with non-slip surface, otherwise the consequences for reversing fractures in the elderly]
天使投资人薛蛮子 商业计划书请发送至——charlesxue@一南方都市报:
【追踪阳澄湖“洗澡蟹”,有的用药水洗白[怒]】“青壳白底”的大闸蟹就能放心吃吗?近年来,由于阳澄湖大闸蟹的需求量巨大,有批发商从湖北大批量购来洪湖大闸蟹冒充。记者追踪发现,更有甚者,为了追求“白肚”的效果,竟用工业草酸、柠檬酸清洗大闸蟹。洪湖蟹经销商称,“阳澄湖哪有那么多蟹,已经跟...全文: m.weibo
[【 tracking yangcheng lake bath crab, some drug use water to wash white [anger]] green shell white hairy crabs can safely eat? In recent years, due to the huge demand for yangcheng lake hairy crabs, a mass wholesalers from hubei honghu hairy crabs pretend to be. The reporter discovers track, what is more, in order to achieve the effect of white belly, wash crab with industrial oxalic acid, citric acid. Honghu crab dealer said, yangcheng lake where have so many crabs, with... The full text m. eibo]
欢迎关注南方都市报官方微博优酷:
#优酷急诊科医生#圆满收官,送一只温暖的独家花絮视频给到大家,虽然电视剧已结局,但愿感动与温暖常伴你这个冬天[心][心]tRYzCuS
[# # youku emergency doctors successfully packaged, send a warm exclusive tidbits video to everybody, although TV has the end, I wish touched with warmth always you [heart] [heart] tRYzCuS this winter]
小浪同学爱吐槽:
【桶装水里惊现黑色漂浮物 定睛一看竟是它[衰]】广州的周女士长期订购某家矿泉水,最近她正准备打开一桶水,却发现水桶里有两只黑色不明物体,其中一只还在动!并且是奋力地在水中挣扎着↓↓“好可怕,毛孔都竖起来了!”周女士称每每想到这画面都会不寒而栗↓↓tRYzCZWu
[【 bottled water near black floater focusing a see unexpectedly is it [failure]] weeks in guangzhou lady ordered a mineral water for a long time, she recently is preparing to open a bucket of water, only to find that a bucket unidentified object has two black, one of them is on the move! And is desperately struggling in the water left left awful, pore all stand up! Ms. Zhou said every time I think of this picture will shudder left left tRYzCZWu down]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。新沐sunshine:
#打卡第十二天#读书半小时。中断了两天周一周二没有读,今天也读了一点点,感觉不足半小时。室内会议[生病]
[Clock in # # days to read half an hour. Interrupted two days Monday and Tuesday didnt read, also read a little bit today, feel less than half an hour. Indoor meeting [ill]]
凡心所向,素履所往,生如逆旅,一苇以航冷笑话精选:
自从知道可以看企鹅,感觉整个人都变可爱了,不唱流行歌了,改念儿歌了~~~企鹅企鹅你怎么那么胖,圆圆的肚子短短腿。#我想去南极# #汇聚全球#
[Since know you can see the penguins, feel the whole people become lovely, not sing pop, nursery school instead ~ ~ ~ penguin penguin you how so fat, round belly short legs. # # # # together global I want to go to Antarctica]
毒舌嘴贱会吐槽,颜正腿长一米八,八块腹肌的冷哥就是我!巴曙松:
十二年持续跟踪研究中国资产管理行业,每年出版一本年度资管行业发展报告,今年的报告终于上市,订阅联系电话余老师、杨老师
[Twelve years continuously tracking the asset management industry in China, published every year a report this years information technology industry development, this years report finally, subscribe to the contact phone number, Yang teacher]
金融学者、博士生导师,中国银行业协会首席经济学家、哥伦比亚大学商学院高级访问学者小浪同学爱吐槽:
【奚梦瑶现身机场心情低落 滑肩穿衣超模风采在线[舔屏]】日,奚梦瑶亮相机场,她身穿白色羽绒服搭配小黑裤大秀长腿,罕见口罩遮面玩低调,不知是否因为走秀摔倒心情受到影响↓↓但是小姐姐不愧是超模出身,随便一件羽绒服也用滑肩穿衣法扮时髦!一睹为快↓↓tRYTAQC
[【 Ming xi appeared depressed at the airport Sliding shoulder dress supermodel style online [lick screen]], Ming xi at the airport, wearing a white jacket with black pants big show long legs, rare mask covered surface play a low profile, and I dont know whether because the runway fall mood affected left left but little sister not the kui is a supermodel, just a down jacket with sliding shoulder dressing method also dress up as fashionable! The day ends left left tRYTAQC]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。猫扑:
一只倔强的小海星,怎么爬都爬不起来,气。tRYhQzOR
[A stubborn little starfish, how to climb all couldnt climb up, gas. tRYhQzOR]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:优酷:
#电视剧将军在上#究竟有多红?战报图在此奉上!网播量、话题度、艺人各项指数再创新高;“爹系”女友引发新一轮潮流;网友安利、画手上阵,剧情讨论度持续飙高。本周昭玉夫妇甜蜜升级,剧情更加深入,大家快快跟上追剧节奏吧#盛一伦式宠爱#
[# # general TV series on how red? The grand figure in on this! Webcasts quantity, subject, artists of various index hit a record high. Dad is girlfriend trigger a new round tide; Users of amway, hand painting, plot discussion all-time high. Zhao jade couple sweet upgrade this week, plot more deeply, we quickly, PLZ keep up with the chase play a homotopy type pet # #]
小野妹子学吐槽:
又到了年底相亲高发季,如何甄别品味好男人?约饭看电影太老套,要约就约出新意!第四届中国国际马戏节正在珠海横琴长隆上演,这是马戏界的奥斯卡盛事,国支全球明星队星光耀眼!有品位,档次高,还不赶紧?#带着微博去马戏节#
[Then at the end of the year to peak season, how to identify good taste man? About rice is too old to see a movie, about a new offer! th China international circus festival is zhuhai hengqin long lung, this is the circus side of Oscar event, with the global team with stars! That has grade, class is high, also dont hurry? # # with weibo to circus festival]
图文多转自日文推特,附以无责任吐槽。关注后易节操丧失、下限消亡、性向逆转、生理失调。微博搞笑排行榜:
#总有人在偷偷爱着你#所有不期而遇的温暖,悄然改变着那些看似暗淡混沌的人生。这世界偷偷爱着你,只是你不知道而已。愿你保持初心和善良,不辜负这最美的时光。 tRYvPqBC
[# # always someone in secretly in love with you all unexpected warmth, quietly changing the seemingly bleak chaotic life. This world secretly in love with you, just you dont know. May you keep in mind and kindness, live up to the most beautiful time. tRYvPqBC]
微博搞笑中心!每天搜罗最搞笑最好玩的微博。关注我,获得每日新鲜笑料!(欢迎合作,投稿)↖(^ω^)↗汽车之家:
正确答案是宝骏W 款 .L 手动时尚型,恭喜@牛吃鱼M ,最快答对,请私信家家您的收货地址,我们会尽快将礼品快递到您手中。
[. The correct answer is baojun W L type manual fashion, congratulations @ cattle eat fish M, fastest answer, please direct messages every of your shipping address, we will gift delivery to you as soon as possible.]
汽车之家为广大汽车消费者提供买车、用车、养车及与汽车生活相关的全程服务,以全面、专业、可信赖、高互动性的内容,多层次、多维度地影响最广泛的汽车消费者,是中国最具价值的互联网汽车营销平台。微博汽车:
预算只有万想买车也不是难事儿~回答问题戳进来![坏笑]戳进来![坏笑]戳进来![坏笑]重要的事情说三遍!希望大家踊跃扔问题来砸我哦[爱你][爱你]tRYzSNNm
[Budget of all want to buy a car is not difficult to answer this question stamp come in! [laugh] stamp come in! [laugh] stamp come in! [laugh] something important three times! Hope everyone eager to throw the problem to hit me oh love you love you [] tRYzSNNm]
这个官微有意思,有车没车不重要,带你装逼带你飞小浪同学爱吐槽:
【弱女子办高中专招中考“差生” 欠债多万元[吃惊]】在河南滑县由李路静创办的文心高中里,除了校长,她还是学校唯一的专业教师,教的大部分都是中考分以下、没高中肯要的学生。为办学校,她欠债多万,收到法院传票...却还是靠这一信念走到今天↓↓tRYzD
[【 weak woman do high school recruit examination difference in debt more than ten thousand yuan [surprised]] in henan huaxian county enjoys founded by li jing wen xin in high school, in addition to the principal, she was the only professional teachers, taught most of them are high test scores in the following, no relevance to the students. For running schools, she more than debt, received the court summons... Still rely on the belief that walk to the left left tRYzD down today]
曾用名@新浪news,国事家事天下事,事事关心。猫扑:
【曝马蓉母亲为转移财产多次结婚 前夫超过三个】今年月,马蓉母亲被曝为帮其转移财产,曾和宋喆父亲先结婚后离婚。如今有媒体又从熟悉此案律师了解,马母为转移财产,不仅和宋父结过婚,还曾与多名男子重复结婚又离婚,“前夫”总数超过三人。为了方便办理手续,还和马蓉私刻了许多国家机关印章。...全文: m.weibo
[【 exposed Anita mother married many times to transfer property Husband more than three 】 this month, Anita mother had to help his transfer property, Ceng Hesong 喆 father first marriage after divorce. Now the media from lawyers understand familiar with this case, the horse mother to transfer property, and Song Fu married not only, also has with many man repeated marriage and divorce, ex total of more than three people. In order to facilitate customs formalities and Anita SiKe many national office seal. ... The full text m. eibo]
猫扑网唯一指定官方微博。私信开放投稿、爆料。商务合作:qq:优酷:
“精英”主演@雷佳音 @邓家佳 @莫小奇_Monica @张晓谦ZHaNG @演员许娣 @王姬 @国话李建义 #程雍# @KK魏巍 集结完毕!走起!!!今晚点#电视剧我不是精英#优酷全网首播![太开心][太开心][太开心]
[Elite starring @ mine better sound @ jiajia deng @ monic _Monica @ Zhang Xiaoqian ZHaNG @ actor Xu Di @ Heidi jian-yi li Cheng Yong # @ # @ the words KK wei wei muster! Walk up!!!!!!!!!!! Point # TV tonight I am not elite # youku tech-oriented premiere! [quite happy] [quite happy] [quite happy]]
杨幂:
月日,我与你一起鉴定美丽[憧憬][憧憬][憧憬]
[June , I identified with you beautiful [hope] [hope] [hope]]
这里有一只狐狸,幸福,感恩,知足,爱~><保时捷:
#porschemoments# 凛冬将至?装备了拉出式雪橇滑雪板固定架的全新 Panamera Turbo 已经期待了整个夏天。
[# porschemoments# winds in winter will come? Equipped with pull out skis fixed frame of the new type sled eve Turbo has been looking forward to the summer. ]
自 年以来,保时捷将旗下全系跑车引入中国,旨在为将我们所倡导的运动体验和创新精神带给每一位渴望挑战、追求完美的中国车友。优酷:
#喜剧总动员# 第二季彩排花絮爆笑播出!#郑爽# 你们小仙女都是拿鸡毛掸子做仙女棒的吗?[笑cry]更有敬业爽认真对剧本逗趣“撩汉”[doge]在优酷#喜总很酷# ,每周六晚八点半,更多精彩,我们不笑不散~ tRYzJWwY
[# # comedy story in the second quarter of the rehearsal broadcast trivia joke! # # Zheng Shuang fairies are you with a feather duster do fairy wand? [laughing cry] more dedicated great earnest to play funny liao han [doge] in youku # # xi always cool, every Saturday night at , more wonderful, we dont laugh ~ tRYzJWwY]
谢娜:
谢谢朋友们穿上 #娜样nayoung# 来捧场,美美哒[笑而不语][耶] @娜样NaYoung
[Thank you friends put on sample # na nayoung# to pay tribute, mei-mei dalai [smiling without a word] [and] @ NaYoung na samples]
太阳女神(也可称为喜神)的光芒照四方呀嘛照四方:)工作邮箱:w@qq(仅限工作)感谢!